Day 43

I notice things I didn't before. There is something about everything falling apart that brings clarity and peace you your mind when you need it the most. You are able to see those moments arise and take advantage of them when they come.

It began snowing during the night. It was so simple and unique. Connor and Seeley stare out of the window as the large flakes fall, and fly past the windows. They have seen snow before, of course, but again, there is something renewing in seeing it again. And I know the boys can feel it. 

We pull over and I step out, holding Seeley in a coat stored in the back, and Connor in the same. Charlotte and Josh and Dawn get out and we play. I throw my head back and stick my tongue out, showing Connor how to catch snow flakes. The snow sticks to the road and grass lining the street and we make foot prints in it, Chasing each other, making snow-angles as well as a weak attempt at a snow man. The boys loved it and so we loved it too. And slowly, almost without noticing we change. We change into something more than survivors. Because through all of the cynicism that comes from such a life we are able to see past the initial goals. We see as children see and find that the complexities are meaningless. 

The boys, laughing and smiling spend the day with us, playing and forgetting Boise, and the zombies through California. We follow their lead and for a day. For one short day we are free. I cannot forget this day.