Day 33

I dream again of the man I killed. Of Crystal and Clive. And of death. When I wake up it is dark in my room. My head and hand are both in pain, and in looking at my hand it is wrapped in a cast and there is a bandage on my head. I can feel it. I am still strapped to the table and can barely move. I look at the ceiling and see the large tiles that are in so many offices. I wonder if I can open them up, and maybe escape. I then consider the two men that come in: the guard and Doctor Grant. He wasn't holding a syringe when he last came in, but still had it when he put me under. He must have it in his pocket. The guard would, however, be more difficult. I consider getting him with the syringe and then taking care of the doctor.

I think on escape and my family and what I can do to get us out of here. The prospect seems overwhelming. Where are they? How would I get them out? How would we get out of here? Wherever here is. I can feel my rage building up. I struggle against the restraints and like clock work, a minute later two men come in, one gives me a shot and they leave. They last thing I think before passing out being, they have camera's in here.

* * *

When I wake again the lights are on. There is a man . . . Doctor Grant . . . standing by me, pulling another needle from an IV, probably something to wake me up.

"Good morning," he says, "I have some good news for you."

I wait but do not speak. He looks pleased. Not malicious, but happy with himself and the news that he is going to give, and for the first time, I understand that he may only be doing this for scientific purposes. However, the guard, I can tell, does not care about me, or anyone else, for that matter. He is ordered to keep me in here, he will keep me in here, even if it means breaking my fingers or hitting me with the butt of his rifle.

"We have released some of your family. Your wife, Dawn. She was kind enough to give us her name, and yours, Aaron. We also released Seeley and Charlotte." He stops and I wait for him to say Connors name, but he doesn't mention it, and so I do.

"What about Connor, or my brothers?"

"Well," he starts, looking towards the guard, "we still need you four. Because of your immunity."

"Connor is immune, but Seeley isn't?"

"Well, you see, It seems to be genetic from what we can tell, and from some general tests We can see that Connor for the gene, but Seeley didn't."

I wait and think about this.  So it is genetic. "Can't you just take some of our blood?"

"Well  certainly we will. But I want to study what your blood does to you when the infection is introduced into your blood stream. I need to induce you with different samples to see the reaction time. The live samples in your body will give us direct test results that we can then duplicate in a lab setting.

"Now, I'm going to unstrap you to make you more comfortable."

The guard walks over and unlatched the straps that pressed my body down. I sit up and try to stay calm. They are going to inject Connor with the infection. They are going to run tests on my son. I tell myself over and over that I need to stay calm. They'll just restrain me if I do anything irrational. And so I need a plan. I need to get out of here.

"Can I see my son?"

"That's the other good news," he says, and he again nods to the guard. "This is only a visit, mind you, but you can see him to help comfort him, or whatever." I look at him and then the door. The guard, I notice goes to the right to get him. That's something.

It takes two minutes for him to return. One minute there, one minute back. Connor is lead into the door and upon seeing me he runs to me and wraps his arms around me. I am crying as I hold him. I don't ever want to let go of him. And, even in their generosity in letting me see him, I loath them more, because in a few minutes they are going to take him back.

"Listen, buddy," I say, still holding him, whispering into his ear. "Do you know what brave is?" He nods. "You're going to have to be brave, OK?"

"I want you."

"I know, I want you too. But I can't right now. But I want you, Connor."

"Rock me, please. Can, I stay with you?"

I am trying to hold in my tears but can't. "You can't stay yet. You have to be brave." I start rocking him back and forth.

"I'm sorry, but we need to take him back."

"No," I say, looking up at Doctor Grant, "Please, just a bit longer."

"I'm sorry." He reaches out to grab Connor.

I hold him tight and whisper in his ear. "I will save you. OK? I will save you, Connor. I love you! I love you so much." They are taking him from me.

"I love you, Daddy," he says and then they grab him from under the arms and he starts to cry and scream.

"No!" I yell. "Please! Let him stay with me. We'll cooperate. Please!" They keep going. I run towards the guard but another stops me, holding me back.

"Connor!" He looks at me, "Connor, I love you!" They close the door.

I am sobbing on the floor. Screaming. "He's only two! I want my son back, damn you! He is only two!"

I scream until my voice gives out and then I bang my fists on the door but there is no answer. I don't know when, but I get tired and collapse on the floor. Still awake I think of what he must be going through. Maybe, as he may not understand it, he is OK. He'll cry for a bit, but then, all he will feel is loneliness. But I can only hope, he remembers what I said. That I love him, and that I am going to save him. This keeps me going, motivates me.

I will escape, and I will save him, and I will save my brothers.